3 month old baby not sleeping. The child does not sleep well at night: looking for reasons

Cases when a child does not sleep well at 3 months are not uncommon. A large number of moms and dads face this, so you should not be afraid of this phenomenon. But experts do not advise disregarding the restless sleep of your beloved child, especially the first year of life. To clarify the situation, parents should clarify the very wording of the question "does not sleep well." Often, this hides indications of the baby’s intermittent sleep, frequent nighttime waking up, which are completely different from the usual full-fledged night’s rest for an adult.

First of all, when it comes to why a child does not sleep well at night, you need to know the features of the regimen for children up to a year old and specifically at this age. Because not always restless sleep is a sign of serious problems.

According to available data, the total duration of sleep for a baby up to a year, at the age of 1 to 3 months, is 18-22 hours a day. However, these are just numbers. And if a three-month-old baby at this age sleeps a little less, but is active, gains weight well and develops according to age norms, you should not worry.

Because the quality of sleep of the baby is greatly influenced by:

  • intrauterine development and course of pregnancy;
  • childbirth process;
  • individual characteristics (type of nervous system, temperament).

It is also worth considering the different sleep structure of babies from adults.

It has been established that in children in the first time after birth, the phase of fast (paradoxical) sleep takes up to 80%. While in two-year-olds this figure is 30%.

Therefore, the motor activity of the crumbs of the third month of life observed in a dream, mimic manifestations, eye movements under closed eyelids, various sobs and smiles - all this is considered by experts as a variant of the norm in infancy.

In order to make it easier for parents to normalize the sleep of their beloved child, you should know where to look for a way to solve the problem. Reduced series possible causes, interfering with the sleep of the crumbs, will help moms and dads navigate the current situation.

So, from what can have a negative impact on the sound sleep of a three-month-old baby, experts note:


A similar list of reasons can be applied in the case when the child does not sleep well during the day.

However, a poorly sleeping baby of 3 months is rather an exception to the rule. If the restless night and daytime sleep of the crumbs continues for a long time, despite the elimination of possible causes, you should immediately contact your pediatrician!

Usually at this age, practically healthy babies, developing by age, do not experience persistent and long-term sleep disturbances. Especially with the close attention of loving and caring parents.

It's no secret that every parent wants to make the sleep of their beloved crumbs as comfortable and strong as possible. However, do not despair if suddenly something went wrong - panic is not the best companion of common sense. A calm attitude and the intention to sort out the situation that has arisen will be a much more profitable option.


Placing a TV in a children's room, according to experts, is not the best solution. However, if this cannot be avoided, it is recommended to limit watching movies and programs in the presence of a child, especially before going to bed.

Summing up the above, we note that the baby's sleep is useful and extremely important for its full and harmonious development, good health, and active wakefulness. As a rule, by the age of three months, babies sleep relatively normally, in accordance with their own characteristics. However, if for some reason the baby fell asleep and slept well, and now his sleep was disturbed, do not panic. A balanced analysis of the situation, taking into account the above recommendations, in most cases leads to success within a few days. To paraphrase the famous philosopher’s statement: “I sleep, therefore I exist,” an established rest regimen will serve the benefit of all family members.

So, at first glance, it seems to you that absolutely nothing should bother the baby: he is full, and the pediatrician claims that the baby is absolutely healthy and no deviations from the norm were found in him. So why does your three-month-old baby sleep so badly at night and during the day? And how to help him, how to determine the cause of this crying?

Let's roughly outline a list of what you need to pay attention to in the first place, from which the child does not sleep very well.

1. Wet or dry?

You seem to be already so skillfully managing your baby’s personal hygiene, and what he “did” in a diaper does not bother you at all and does not plunge you into a state of shock. Previously, you were probably afraid that you would take it wrong, take off the diaper wrong, set the water incorrectly. Now these problems have disappeared by themselves, you are already dexterous and maneuverable.

The child does not sleep well during the day at 3 months

But sometimes mom, having buried herself in everyday chores and leaving the baby to peacefully stare at her through the bars of the crib or the mesh of the playpen, does not immediately understand that the baby has just (or even not just) been freed from excess burden and longs to be clean. No wonder: after all, the temperature “in the diaper” is quite high, as well as the level of humidity. Therefore, feces irritate the skin of the crumbs and cause acute itching and burning.

Therefore, if you hear the invocative cry of the crumbs, check his diaper. After all, if you are a supporter of the fact that they need to be changed every 4 hours, you can keep the baby in a dirty diaper for 4 hours - and even then the crying will not end at the place when you wash it. The priest will suffer greatly from such treatment, and the baby will be tormented by itching and pain from irritation for a long time - the child does not feel well in such conditions. So make it a habit to check your baby's diaper as often as possible.

2. Hunger.

So what if your baby literally an hour ago, in your opinion, ate a hearty meal, or rather, got drunk well breast milk(I ate a decent portion of the mixture). What if he didn’t eat at all, but simply quenched his gnawing hunger, which visited him again an hour later. And now he is crying, asking for supplements, and you are all fussing around him, not even suspecting that your baby simply does not fit the hourly feeding regime that you introduced for the sake of convenience.

Try giving him a little more formula or breastfeeding again - see if he starts to eat greedily? If yes, then it is probably time for you to increase portions of food, as the baby does not eat enough and does not sleep well from this.

3. Gas and intestinal colic.

The problem that most often occurs in infants, just under the age of 3 months (less often - up to six months, although there are some cases when the children's gastrointestinal tract completes the formation process and begins to act as expected, and at the age of one and a half years). It is difficult to prevent the occurrence of this unpleasant situation, since 90% of children of three months of age have both gaziki and colic, and they are little dependent on their parents.

But you can help too. First, figure out if he is awake at night due to colic? This is very easy to do: feel your baby's belly. When a child has gases, the stomach resembles a tightly stretched drum, the abdominal cavity inflates and it seems that something very hard is inside the baby. In addition, during a cry, if a child of three months or older lies in a crib or you carry him on the arms, he begins to arch his back strongly - this is another sign that the crumbs have terrible intestinal colic.

You can help your child! Buy some from the pharmacy dill water– use it as a preventive measure, regardless of whether the child has this moment colic and gas, or not. A teaspoon at night is an excellent prevention of bloating.

About an hour before bedtime, give the baby a little massage and exercise. With your warm hand, massage the abdomen of the crumbs, moving in a clockwise direction. You can lubricate your hand with baby cream. In addition, gently but firmly press the bent legs of the crumbs to his tummy, 10-15 times will be enough. And the kid will definitely like this workout. In principle, any exercises associated with raising the legs and stroking the abdomen help get rid of colic.

If you notice that the baby’s stomach is swollen and hardened before going to bed, put a warm heating pad on his stomach - you can buy a special baby bottle at the pharmacy, it is small, comfortable round shape. You can just put your hand, or attach the baby with your bare belly to your stomach - this also helps get rid of colic.

In cases of extraordinary and especially noisy, when the baby does not calm down from any of your actions and is already turning blue and choking on crying and pain, give him Espumizan or some similar drug, this is the right way to help the baby. However, do not abuse and remember that the less chemistry you give your child, the healthier he will grow.

Also, a child may cry because he is cold or hot, or he simply misses his mother's warmth, and this makes him feel bad - do not deprive him of these little joys in life! And to check whether the baby is comfortable in specific temperature conditions, just feel his neck. If she sweats - undress the baby, if she is cold - dress.

As you can see, there are several reasons why a three-month-old baby may not sleep well and be naughty often. Parental duty is to understand and eliminate all these troubles so that the baby grows and develops, fueled only by positive emotions!

The older the baby gets, the more time he spends awake. He begins to get used to the new world. The total length of time for rest begins to decrease. In spite of interesting world around, he still gets tired pretty quickly, so you need to carefully monitor how much the baby should sleep at 3 months. The mode of sleep and wakefulness at 3 months is still little different from a newborn and looks like this: wakefulness - food - sleep. Feeding should turn into rest, after waking up, you should wait a bit, let him get hungry (quite a bit). A 3 month old baby should sleep about three hours during the day. At this age, the child sleeps more soundly and longer at night. He cannot stay hungry for more than 5 hours, so he will wake up to eat. Some children do not want to fall asleep immediately after feeding, try to avoid this, as it will be even more difficult to teach him later.

Opinions about how much a baby should sleep at 3 months differ. Children's doctors believe that the baby should sleep at 3 months 16 hours a day. Time is divided between night and daytime sleep, the baby should be awake for about 8 hours.

It happens when a child of 3 months sleeps all day. If during breaks he is not capricious, eats with appetite, then there is no reason for concern. The reasons may be different, bad weather or the baby got tired the day before, had a bad rest at night.

day rest

When a baby is born, the duration of his daytime and nighttime sleep is approximately the same. Already by the third month, the regime begins to slowly shift, night sleep increases, respectively, during the day the baby sleeps less. On average, a child sleeps at 3 months during the day for 5-6 hours, this period is divided into 3-4 sleeps to restore lost energy. Of course, you should not blindly believe the norms, each baby is individual. If your child's regimen is different, don't worry. During this period, the body itself is able to choose the desired mode, the main thing is that at the same time it feels great and does not cry.

Night rest

The sleep pattern of a 3-month-old baby at night is 2/3 of the daily norm, about 10-11 hours. Feed him at night should be on demand, this is about 2 feedings. In no case should a newborn sleep at 3 months hungry. He still won't fall asleep or sleep will be restless.

Should I take my baby to bed with me?

Here the opinions of experts differ. Some believe that up to a year and a half he can sleep with you, while others are categorically against it. How to proceed is up to you. Consider the pros and cons:

  • + the baby trusts the mother more;
  • + he feels calm and comfortable;
  • + with constant contact, the mother's milk becomes more.
  • you can overfeed the baby;
  • there is a fear of crushing it, sleep becomes disturbing and intermittent;
  • lack of privacy for parents.

How to teach your baby to fall asleep on their own?

It is necessary for the newborn to develop a reflex. To understand how to put a 3 month old baby to bed, you must come up with a ritual when he understands that it's time to rest. How to teach a 3 month old baby to sleep? For example, it can be an evening swim at a certain time. You can also tell stories, sing songs. After a while, the baby will begin to understand that after such actions you need to go to bed. It will become easier and easier to lay, he will get used to it.

Do not rock the newborn in your arms, it will soon become a habit and it will be difficult to wean, but at the moment of shifting, he will still wake up. The bed should be comfortable, clean, it is important for him to feel protected.

Make sure that the baby does not get too tired, this will adversely affect the quality of sleep.

Mom needs to know how to put the baby to bed at 3 months and understand that the baby is falling asleep. At this moment, he must be put in the cradle, even if he wakes up, seeing his mother nearby, falls asleep again.

Why is the baby not sleeping?

If you're concerned that your 3-month-old baby isn't sleeping well during the day, don't panic. At this age, he is more actively accepted to learn about the world around him. Begins to be interested in toys, surrounding and, above all, communication with you. All these actions lead to overexcitation, he does not sleep well during the day.

If a child at 3 months does not sleep during the day for a long time, this should alert, the reasons may be different:

  1. disease;
  2. your worries or tensions between your parents;
  3. too stuffy or cold in the room;
  4. failure of the regime and feeding.

If all attempts to put the baby in vain, remember how he behaved over the past day:

  1. analyze the child’s sleep time at 3 months, how long he slept the previous night, how well he slept, ate well. There may be a disease or fever. In this case, call the pediatrician.
  2. Think about family relationships. Perhaps the baby feels tension between the parents or witnessed a quarrel. Children feel these things very much and are worried. Only good relationships and love contribute to a stable mental state.
  3. The climate in the room where the baby sleeps is no less important, it is important to know how the baby should sleep at 3 months. The ideal temperature of the atmosphere is 22-23 degrees, the humidity is about 50%. During the heating season, the air in the apartments is often too dry, it is recommended to use a humidifier.
  4. It happens that a newborn can confuse day and night. What to do if the child stopped sleeping during the day at 3 months? It is important to let him know that during the day life is more active, and at night you need to sleep. Keep the TV on during the day and speak out loud. At night, on the contrary, close the curtains and speak more quietly, dim the lights. He'll be rebuilt soon.

How to understand that the baby wants to sleep?

Mom needs to become extremely sensitive, since at the age of three months the baby cannot control sleep and wakefulness. Because nervous system not yet formed, it is not able to regulate the time for relaxation and rest. Constant parental control is important. Signs that it's time for your baby to sleep:

  • he becomes lethargic, activity falls;
  • blinking slows down and eyes stick together;
  • it is accepted to yawn and rub eyes;
  • naughty and crying;
  • everything becomes uninteresting, the baby is nervous.

After noticing these signs, shake just a little of the baby and transfer to the crib. He will quickly fall asleep and sleep will be strong.

Sleep on the street

3 month old babies sleep with pleasure on the street. Fresh air is especially important for a newborn. Try to have two naps during the walk. Especially in warm weather, take every opportunity to go outside. Approximately 5 hours a child sleeps at 3 months in the fresh air, ideally. Sleeping in the air forms a stable nervous system, protects the lungs from respiratory and inflammatory diseases, strengthens the immune system. Children fall asleep faster outside and sleep better. If you went home and the baby didn’t wake up, you don’t need to wake her up, remove the warm blanket and put it in the crib or leave it in the stroller.

You should walk at any time of the year, in winter, reduce the time of walking, but do not stop them. If the weather is really bad, you can open the window and put the stroller on the balcony or put it to bed with the window open (dress it to prevent illness).

The attention of the mother (she must clearly know how much the child sleeps at 3 months) and rituals that help form the order of the day for the child will help to avoid problems with falling asleep. The sleep will be strong and the baby will be able to fully restore strength, which will help to explore the world around him with interest and get to know his mother better.

Doctors, who have been in possession of sleep research tools since the mid-20th century, claim that more than half of today's children have problems with sleep, and this number is constantly growing in our prosperous "disoriented" time.

What can a mother give a child, falling down from lack of sleep?

What can a mother who falls down from lack of sleep give a child? There is no strength for active educational games, the house is neglected, a tense psychological situation in the family leads to a reduction in breast milk, the baby does not eat up, does not get tired during the day and wakes up crying all night, and in the morning everything starts from the beginning. "Well, it will outgrow it! - convince themselves alone, shifting the responsibility for what is happening to an innocent baby. "Clear mode! To the crib - and let him yell! - raise the forgotten methods of ignoring the state of the child others.

And there are also unscrupulous researchers who claim that women are naturally able to sleep fitfully without harm to themselves. Selfish fathers read the comments of scientists, and then sincerely wonder why they are not considered as “real” family members: “Did you bring money? Food is on the table, the TV in the hall is free.”

Even the dog, a family pet, supports the exhausted mother with silent sympathy. And the head of the family "according to the state" is supposed to, together with the mother and the baby, look for ways out of the situation that has arisen. After all, the baby also feels better and looks healthier when he sleeps safely at the allotted time. Our task is to eliminate possible ailments and help him master this difficult task.

Why does the child sleep badly

What can prevent the baby from sleeping peacefully at this time and giving mom the opportunity to fully relax for his own good?

"Children's" problems: your baby turned out to be an "owl", which means that it will be too late to go to bed. You will try in vain to make him lie down, he, reacting to your irritation and despair, will scream until he wants to sleep.

Unfortunately, the biological rhythm of the child does not depend on parental attitudes. And the healthy habit of getting up early works only in some cases, regardless of the age of those tested. That is, you can get used to getting up at 6 in the morning and starting to work, but scientists testify that the physiological processes in the body remain inhibited until the “natural” time of awakening.

And if the child-owl went to parents-larks, you will have to find a compromise: active time - for the "general" middle of the day, obligatory daytime sleep for mom, quiet games in the morning and evening.

Doesn't this combination of interests of all family members look like the daily routine so unloved by modern mothers? Alas, psychologists testify that the first generation of those whom their parents at one time saved from the regime, giving at the same time, it would seem, and unconditional love, and protection from stress, approached her 20s with a range of behavioral and psychological problems. Life again confirmed the obvious postulate: it is good in moderation and in the right place.

"Adult" problems: colic, gas, teething, illness of the baby, confused day and night - here insomnia is understandable, and the need for help is obvious. But after six months these problems are solved. And after each of these failures, the life of the family returns to its usual course, taking into account the interests of all its members.

If other dysregulations (changes in muscle tone, increased excitability) are added to sleep disorders in a child of the first year of life, it is worth getting a consultation with a neurologist. In such cases, sometimes a diagnosis of "perinatal damage to the nervous system" is made and appropriate treatment is selected.

But in this case, the doctor will answer the questions of the parents. And how to respond to sleep disorders if the baby is healthy?

Dreamed of something

Often, parents are worried about whimpering or baby crying in a dream, or nighttime awakenings of the baby. What to do: if you have not yet gone to bed, quietly approach, touch, stroke, without speaking, and move away again. If a whimper woke you up, it is worth listening, and if it does not have demanding notes in it, it will soon subside. If the baby still woke up, put him to bed in the usual way, without entering into a conversation with him, without trying to distract him with a game. Your task is not to “calm down”, increasing the load on the nervous system of the crumbs, but to give him the opportunity to calm down himself.

The ability of self-soothing at the age of 1 year already develops in 60-70% of children. With panicky attention and fussy behavior of parents, the skill of self-soothing is artificially delayed, and initially natural awakenings develop into sleep disorders.

Leave passionate hugs and ardent declarations of parental love until morning. It always only increases the anxiety of the crumbs - so there is something to save from? Replace it with the belief "You're fine."

At night, everyone is calm, everyone is fine, everyone is sleeping - this confirms your measured, even breathing, under which the baby will willingly adjust, smooth movements, muffled light in a bluish-green range.

Someone is helped by the so-called "white noise", the sound of a waterfall, the singing of birds - sounds that affect the subconscious and testify that "there is no danger nearby - because the birds sing calmly." There are many such forgotten "helpers" in our genetic memory. However, on particularly stressful days, tea with valerian or motherwort will not harm a mother and a bath with herbs for a child.

Techniques for improving the sleep of a child

Demand creates supply, and today a number of special techniques have been developed to establish restful and sound sleep in healthy babies: this is the Esteville method, and the Ferber method, and "Silent Night", and even "100 simple ways put the child to sleep" by Svetlana Bernard.

We note right away that all of them are recommended only to parents who are confident in the need for such a practice for themselves and their child. All of them require thoughtful application and taking into account the characteristics of your child and family traditions. And none of the methods did not do without harsh criticism from the mothers "fascinated" by parenthood.

Recommendation: read the suggestions contained in a particular method. Write down on a piece of paper your problems and proposals for solving them, with which you agree. Invite your spouse to do the same. Together(!) identify ways to improve sleep that are right for the three of you. And stick to them relentlessly for at least a month or two. After all, it is always difficult to fix a broken one, and only endurance, patience and reasonable love help here. And may sweet dreams and full of energy days be your reward.

Ekaterina Rakitina

Dr. Dietrich Bonhoeffer Klinikum, Germany

Reading time: 11 minutes

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Article last updated: 03/27/2019

Sleep problems at night are the trouble of almost all parents of children from birth to a year. Especially the problem of poor sleep is relevant in the first months of life. Why can a child at 3 months sleep poorly at night, what are the reasons?

Before sounding the alarm and aiming at a whole list of medical treatments, you need to figure out - is the baby really not sleeping well at night or is he just restless? And, if his sleep is significantly disturbed, what are the causes of this phenomenon and how to eliminate them. Why is it difficult to put a baby to bed, he worries in a dream? And in what case restless sleep- this is normal? Let's figure it out together.

When restless sleep is normal

Let's return to the question - does the baby really sleep badly? Why did parents decide that their child's sleep is bad at night? If a child from time to time

  • cries out
  • spinning
  • jerks legs and arms in a dream, sometimes wakes himself up and needs to put him down again,
  • cries in his sleep or makes groaning sounds (by the way, this is how he laughs).

This is not a bad dream, but a restless one. And this is the norm.

Physiological crying, sounds, mimic and motor activity in the REM phase occur in quite healthy children.

How to calm down

If the child sleeps with his mother, then you can put your hand on his tummy, hold the moving arms and legs so that he does not wake himself up, and he will continue his dream.

If motor activity is weak and the child is whimpering in his sleep, there is no need to rush to take any action. Your baby is sleeping, and his nervous system is "processing" new information.

It is good if parents spare the psyche of their baby and do not watch TV in his presence, do not listen to loud music and do not swear with each other. But even in this case, the baby's psyche is tested.

And the little man can sleep restlessly. If his relatives are lovers of loud music, TV fans, and even talk to each other in raised tones, you can be sure that their child’s sleep will not only be restless, but very bad (both in the daytime and at night).

Why does a child sleep poorly at night?

At night, sleep suffers more, because by the evening the family gathers in full force and all the main emotional burden on the child falls on this period of time - just when it should be minimal.

Not all children are born with balanced nervous processes: for some, inhibition predominates, for others, excitation. All cases are variants of the norm.

How to calm an excitable child

Excitable children are more difficult to calm down, and getting them to sleep is also more difficult. They often sleep poorly at night. They need special approach and not only at the age of three months. For these babies, it is especially important to create a calm, comfortable environment.

At the same time, active actions should be concentrated in the first half of the day, and in the evening, vivid impressions, acquaintance with new toys and strangers should be minimized.

  • If dad bought an interesting novelty for the baby, show him the toy not in the evening, but the next day.
  • If your relatives really want to come visit and for some reason you cannot offer them to visit the baby when he gets older, have them come before 4 pm so that the crumbs have time to experience new experiences and calm down. But this, most likely, will not help, and restless sleep is guaranteed that night.

Changes in sleep structure at 3 months of age

At the age of three months, children who sleep separately from their mothers begin to sleep poorly or restlessly.

Why is this happening? It has to do with the structure of a child's sleep. Deep and restful sleep is inferior in time to superficial sleep, and if for some reason the baby woke up, most likely he will need help. Only some babies fall asleep on their own, most babies wake up and cry in the absence of their mother. Sometimes her presence alone is enough for the baby to feel safe and fall asleep.

The main causes of poor sleep in children

A child at 3 months may not sleep well for the following reasons:

  • Hunger;
  • Anxiety and loss of a sense of security due to the absence of a mother;
  • External stimuli - sounds, flashes, heat air, etc.;
  • Malaise;
  • Overwork.

Hunger

A baby at the age of 3 months does not sleep well, who during the day, for one reason or another, received a smaller portion of food (or less high-calorie) than he needed. Many children up to six months or up to a year (and some longer) need night feeding.

If a half-asleep baby is given a breast, he will not finally wake up and will soon fall asleep peacefully.

But if the mother sleeps separately, or even in another room, she simply will not have time to do this and everything will look as if the child is not sleeping well.

Many children under one year old are in dire need of the presence of their mother. Experts recommend practicing co-sleeping with a baby up to a year old (some up to 2-2.5 years old). Until what age parents will allow their child to "occupy" the parental bed - it's up to them.

It should be remembered that co-sleeping with a child from 0 to 1 year reduces the likelihood of sudden infant death in a dream, allows mom and baby to have a better rest, and satisfies the baby's need for maternal presence.

Why this happens and what are the mechanisms of this process, unfortunately, is not yet known for certain. In this case, experts operate with sociological data. They also testify that sudden death in a dream it happens less often in families where children sleep with their mothers. This is especially true for boys (the frequency of their death under the age of one year is higher than that of girls).

Extraneous irritants and how to minimize them

If the room in which the child sleeps overlooks a nearby road, cars brake loudly, light enters the windows, then sleep will be disturbed when sharp sounds or flashes coincide with the transition of the baby’s sleep phases or coincide with superficial sleep.

When the child is sleeping soundly (i.e., is in a calm phase), such factors cannot wake him up, but in the phase of superficial sleep, especially if the mother is not around, loud pops or the sound of a braking car can scare the baby.

Sometimes the “wonderful neighbor” prevents the baby from sleeping. Today it is unlikely that you will meet someone who will play the trombone and trumpet behind the wall, but loud music from passing cars equipped with powerful buffers is by no means uncommon. Family members who cannot be torn away from the TV are no exception. In such conditions, it will be difficult for a small person to sleep.

Good soundproof plastic windows, blackout curtains and closed doors can improve the situation a bit.

Many people believe that if a person cannot fall asleep in the noise - he does not want to sleep. This is not entirely true. Sleep with a noise load of more than 40 dB will not be full. Normal level noise in the apartment at night 30-40 dB. With such noise, the child is able to fully relax. Higher numbers will affect the quality of sleep at night.

Moro reflex, what to do?

Many mothers ask - why does a child throw up his arms at night in a dream? In children at 3 months, the Moro reflex (protective reflex, a manifestation of fright) has not yet died out, which is expressed in a sharp throwing up of the handles up with spread fingers.

How to check if the Moro reflex has passed in a child? The way to cause such a reflex is to hit the changing table next to the baby. If this is how it is called, then any sharp sound can cause it. With a jerk of the arms, the baby wakes up.